April 30, 2010 - Redo

Wouldn't it be perfect if everyone got a redo in their lives?

A single regret in your life that you really thought changed your life for the worse, and you can't keep it away permanently. You try to so hard, but at the end of the day, there's always something that reminds you of that tiny little regret.

Of course, I'm not saying that you walk around constantly thinking about it. Of course not, you learn to numb the memory of it by doing other activities, and by numbing the memories you suppress it deep within the concaves of your mind, not allowing it to bother your normal activities.

But you do get reminded of them. When you have a chance to slow down, you stop and sometimes wonder about these regrets and how you wish they never happened.

I can proudly say that I did watch a show called "Being Erica". It's actually very interesting (and it's Canadian, yay). It shows how this one girl is able to go back in time to fix the little regrets that she has. It's small ones like forgetting to do stuff with friends that ultimately causes other people to view her as undependable, to stuff like how she wanted to save her brother from burning to death in a fire.

So what would you guys do? All jokes aside I'd probably change how I dealt with my relationships with people. Not only would I try harder to stay in touch, I'd also probably try to be less shy/intimidating when I meet people. Nothing big but one of my biggest regrets is not being a person who was able to make friends instantaneously.

But for the past 48 days I've had no regrets about anything too serious to cloud my mind, so I guess those regrets have just become wishes and memories in the sand.

I have no idea how to fit this quote into my story or post, but it IS a good quote, so I gotta add it.

"You are the product of your past" - Someone

-Canon Ma

I couldn't take any photos that was related to this post (again), so let me just post some stuff up from the past again.

April 29, 2010 - Inspirations. Idols

How intense if the influence of our idols?

Throughout my life I've never had much direction. Which meant i never had any inspiring people such as celebrities and famous icons that might have shaped who i am.

But is that bad? Does everyone really need inspiration from famous people? Is it impossible to be good at something without it?

Photographers strive to be big names like Ansel Adams or Annie Lebowitz (see? i don't even know much)
Actors strive to make it to the big times like other bigger older actors.
Musicians, young entrepreneurs all have inspirations and most scientists will always envy Albert Einstein or another.

And they all become great people, they all set the bar so high that they work hard to achieve it.

Which then makes me think about myself. I have no business inspirations, i have no graphic art idols, and the only idol i have is Ansel Adams (but like my photographs will ever match his...). So does that make me destined for mediocrity?

Without a clear bar to set for, and me only striving for kind of greatness in the fog, will that create naivety and ultimately make me fail?

Not only for myself actually. I hear a lot of people just studying, studying, and studying, but their goal for the moment is good grades. But at the same time, they never mention about their future goals in life. They too seemed to be at my point in life, where everything is not clear and it seems like it'll never be clear (and they too, have no idols or inspirations).

What will happen to the people who don't have clear paths then?...

-Canon Ma

These pictures have no relation to my post, but because I was unable to take some today, I shall give you something to look at anyways.

April 28, 2010 - Venice Choy

 I realized that most of my posts didn't include much life/friends from McMaster...kind of makes me seem like a loser. NOT TRUE... or... not as true as you think.

Still a bit of a loser, but now with more Cantonese friends, and one of them (and probably the closest one) is some THING called Venice Choy (i joke venice, haha).

I don't remember my first encounter with her, but after awhile she was one of those few people i felt comfortable speaking Cantonese with (and one of the few who can understand it with my huge accent).

Venice if you're reading this, I'm very thankful that you can be so patient with my Cantonese, my Mandarin, but it's okay, you're english sucks =].

A very funny thing about her is that she's shy and scared of people who are smarter then her (which was why she was so intimidated by me at first, DUH) ... OH, and she's emo... really emo, she listens to some taiwanese girl who's emo, and is a rocker.

emo rock girl music, yay.

-Canon Ma